Maybe Something You Will Not Agree With, But It Was On My Mind

First month of summer started and I feel the decay.  Knowledge I acquired is slowly draining from my mind.  We learned all of this info and worked so hard in our lives just to watch it crumble away in the gentle winds of summer (or the huge storm we saw today).  I feel I have to struggle to maintain my current knowledge, with little hope of acquiring more by myself.  What is the point of grasping this info?  To be different.  

On another topic, for some reason this summer feels lonelier than previous summers, though it really isn’t.  Maybe because I don’t have books to read.  Why do I feel this way?  I was content all the other summers, why is this the summer that makes me super bored?  Again, I feel it is a method to be different.  

Then I guess the real question is: why do we try to be different?  Let’s face it, only a few people in the world will actually be different, people who are amazing and will be in the annals of history.  Everybody else is just a reiteration of another.  We live mediocre lives.  Yeah I know you are thinking “you can’t know until you try” and all that crap.  Yes I’m an idealist like that too but I know and you should know that sometimes being special is beyond our own control, even if the ideals of our society and capitalism say otherwise.  

That is the paradigm of our society.  We always want to make the next day better than this one.  Why not just be happy and content with life as it is?  Unless you are one of those great people, this is all you are going to get.  To live without wishing to be special is harder than expected.  We always feel we are special, as individuals and as a species.  But it is the destiny for humans to strive for this specialness, only to fail.  

The hard thing for people to understand is they are not special.  Someone can probably do what you do better.  Doesn’t mean you should quit everything, but it means find enjoyment without the expectation of being special.  It means to strive to be better without the expectation of surpassing humanity’s bounds.  To live without hurting others, without stealing (not in a material sense), without causing a wave, that is hard for humans to do.  This is the ordinary, mundane life we live.  Best leave the pain of thinking yourself special and live life as it really is.